The ol' story of Fermus
This info is not intended to be read for finding info on my work ethics or what i i am currently up to today, i am and always will be very transparent, but I also want to warn you to read this if you're looking for my current skills.
This is a personal story and not a personal letter for work.
My interest in computers began when I got to test my mother's first PC, which was a 386. I immediately got stuck on Q-basic where I started by re-coding the game Worms and found it fantastic that you could create your own version of an already developed programs by randomly changing stuff in the codes.
I remember i used to sneak in the newly created "computer room" at my school to download programs and games and copy them on a floppy who i later brought home.
It was under this time i learned coding webpages in straight HTML and started composing digital music in Fasttracker 2.
When my mom and dad separated i got a hold of a 14k modem and got lucky enough to keep the computer in my room when i lived together with my dad and his new girlfriend, I was already quite active in the demoscene here trough mIRC where we shared files, created 3D animations, made chiptunes and hacked bad written pages and stuff, sharing all our work through our channels who kept on growing.
Note: I was nowhere near some programmers so i basically just made the music to keygens and learned a lot from others, i still to this day consider myself a selfcriticed bad scriptkidde, but i remember some really fun moments we had. Felia.
Some time later around -99 I bought my first own PC and my first 28.8k modem and started to play Medal of honor: Allied Assault where we gathered some Swedish gamers and later on dominated in the national league at clanbase.
I still was living with my dad but this time had my own basement with an own entry all by myself and i had started working to be able to pay rent and for the phone line i was constantly holding up, making my dad furious at least 2 times a day.
I remember him almost destroying my door because he FOMO'd on Bingolotto once.
Haxxormode @ 01:19 , the wallhacker tried to shoot me, i hear ppl downstairs right after i got shoot and then go back and oneshoot him.
The age of the rebel
I started playing World of warcraft with some of my friends from MOH:AA, (pretty rebelish eh) combining it with a very fun life with constant out partying, going to festivals, sleeping at strange places and making real stupid life choices with my IRL friends. (yeh, i had some and still do)
Haven't we all gone trough this phase?
I had moved out of my fathers house and gotten my own apartment and bought me a very good PC equipment after i got some my insurance money from when I've been used as a football by 3 guys after a very happenin night out. Their main mission was to break my face, which they manage to do pretty good.. my noose is pretty big.. and used to be straight and fine. Now it´s.. well. bigger.. and not.. that straight anymore.
If I remember it correctly, the computer I bought was a Pentium 3 with a geforce 2mx who i learned to overclock, the insurance money also payed for a 2 week constant partying trip with my cousin to Cyprus. Perfect priorities!
I used some of my underdeveloped skills under this time to fool some systems and earn some of my living on stupid things. Almost none of the new Casino pages were encrypted and the games had open post and get abilitys making it very easy to manipulate the outcome of games. If I lost 1 slot draw I lost x1 but if I won 1 I won x10 or more if i wanted to.. This was not that known between hackers at this time and it took a time until the online casinoindustry made it a standard and sercured these easy fixed holes.
I also won a lot of stuff by manipulating the outcome in online contests these days. I stopped doing this when i got a real job.
Imagine if i've started working as a security checker this time instead of wasting it on shit like this and walking on the thin thread all the time. On the other hand i felt like i never was going anywhere and had almost given up on life and it was the only thing who I felt made me pay my bills to be able to survive.
I was very lucky i never got caught. Today big tech companys should consider it very lucky they got the bugtrackers and whitehat hackers working like hell instead.
Here is another example of my ADHD, after dominating WOW with my guild i started to explore the world looking for glitches and strange places, i remember i could get stuck somwhere spending hours to jump and try keyboard patterns to get loose and jumping out of the map. I even made a video about it and uploaded it to Google videos. (now Youtube)
At the beginning of 2009 i came back online a bit more mostly sharing files through torrents, the demoscene had more or less been lost (to me) and it was all torrents and rippin movies at Piratebay on the agenda still. The new fly Facebook had grown a significant deal and brought a lot of new people online.
At 2010 i brought my first kid to the world, this was an intense time.. in fact so intense I brought my second kid to the world only 2 years later and today im sitting here with 3 talking and very wildly loud offsprings.
I´ve gotten very interested in the Blockhain tech, specially with NFT's as i really believe Blockchain will change our and our coming generations lifes, the tech is flawfull and whatever will come out of Bitcoin, ETH or even shitcoins like Tron it will be blockchain based with an outcome from technerds like the better ones then me. It is like a revenge of the nerds with over 20 years of piecing stuff together.
Do i think the major public is ready right now? NO I dont.. and i do NOT think u should invest money into it yet if your not comfortable. I dont invest money myself.. but i do invest my time.
My second mission in life is to make the best out of my kids before i leave this earth and i also want them to be ready for the tech to come. They are all three already vivid gamers.
I currently work nightshift at one of the north's biggest foodcompanys and also work as a freelance webdesigner at my own company. I've also come to realise due to one of my kids having ADHD that i've also had this problem troughout my childhood and still do today.. But i want to show him the benefits of it.
When i like to do something or create something.. I go all in 300% and forget about the other important things.. and this you can tell by listening to my music or go trough my works, even by reading this story.
There is always very very much of my works but i am never ever 100% satisfied with it.
It's just a pitty that i had to turn 40 to be ready to understand and handle these kind of things, i have also always had angsiety of "showing" myself or making myself "public", I have a hard time accepting positivie feedback but i am trying to change this. This is something i want my kids to start early with.
I guess my first mission is to make this self critic (selfish?) personal web project... who nobody probably will give a damn about anyhow... but maybe my kids one day will read this? .. maybe i am making it for myself?
I just know for some strange reason that i have to get it done. Maybe i am shooting myself in my leg as these kind of things could cross one of Swedens biggest laws: the Jantelag .
WHAT ABOUT YOUR MUSIC ?
Almost all of my IRL friends i grew up with are great musicians today, some play in punkbands, some in rock, some in country or folkrock bands. I went trough the art program at school with focus on music.
I learned notes, how to play the guitar, a little bit of piano and got the highest grade in guess what.. Music technology.
When i grew up it was all about skate and punkrock, i love the expressness in this musicstyle and i listened to it a lot while my time as a skateboarder. But i consider myself as an all kind listener of music. I love the expressness of music. The way to bring a feeling to someone without using any words.
It was very hard to to be true with your feelings about music when growing up, i remember liking songs who i did not mention to my friends as this songs wasnt really a punkrock or a rocksong. I was to get justified as a disco kid so i kept my mouth shut about it.. but it got better when i started high school and got to really focus on music where all my classmates was on the same line.
Theres a lot of shit music today making it to the tops but its important to know that we all have different believes and emotions but to be transparent.. most of the music today is manipulated and bought up by the big techs.
My music will never be a one music style. and the musicprojects i make will be made only if i feel inspired about doing them.